The originality report is not valid and not intellectual enough. It shows that I have 5% plagiarism. However, the two parts it highlight are a quotation, which is put in quotation marks, and a portion of my works cited. The reason of the highlighting is the exact phrases has appeared in other’s paper; however, since it is a quotation and a standard MLA format works cited, the phenomenon is impossible to avoid. Nevertheless, I learned that the same source could be used by different individuals for different purposes; thus, not twisting the ideas of the sources were ethical. Since I did my best to revise the citations before I turned in the homework, I can not identify any other plagiarisms.
I take my writing as drawing my self-portrait. Although the writing prompts are not always come up by me, and most of them are homework assignments, I can always find thesis that I feel the urge of writing them down and arguing for. As an artist, the process of accomplishing a self-portrait is just like writing. I begin with a clear prompt — drawing myself. But after deliberating of the plan for accomplishing the artwork, I am inspired, and start figuring out what properties of myself that cannot wait to express through my self-portrait.
Not only the thesis, but also the process of researching for the thesis is just like drawing my self-portrait. In research, I start with meticulously reading original sources, analyzing their data, and figuring out the relationships. In drawing, I start with closely observing my face, recognizing the details, and reconstructing the structures.
However, the process doesn’t stop as the general sketch of the writing or the portrait is done on the paper, I start thinking about additional insights and ideas. I begin asking my self “what else do I want to convey?” “what else do I want to reflect?” “how am I going to finish it?” In drawing the portrait, it is the time to adding depth into eyes, blush onto checks, and shadows reflecting curves. In writing the paper, it is the time to challenging audience and sharing additional ideas.
Self-portrait of Yige Liu (Painted by Yige Liu, 2015)
Where do you come from? Illinois.
The Race Card is inspired by my friend’s experience in Florida. Although my friend’s grandparents are from China, he was born and raised in Illinois with the identity of an US citizen. People asked him where did he come from for multiple times simply based on his skin color, so that I do think this concise question and the answer show how people judge other’s nationality based on race instead of what they truly experienced. This Race card is also inspired by the seventh quotation in “Unpacking the Invisible Knapsack” that brings the discussion of relationship between actual national heritage and the superficial skin color.
My Friday will be nothing different from a normal Friday. I am only 19 years old, which means that I am not permitted to drink. I am going back to dorm after classes. If I have homework to do, I might study at Grainger Library. However, the “holiday” might affect the community as a whole. When people are drunk, crazy things can be done. Moreover, the atmosphere of “rave” is dangerous. Despite sexual assault, toxication, and potential traffical accidents, gun shooting can be also taken place because people are not going to be as rational as they should be. If I don’t watch out on Friday, my safety is insecure.
This week, I have refined my research topic. My research topic was “How College Students Become Victims of Mental Illness” last week; however, after reading the interview of Gerard, I realized the art of research is starting with a neutral but curious perspective and enjoy exploring what I haven’t learned yet. As a result, I deleted the biased phrases in the research topic and changed it into “How Mental Illness Affects College Students.”
My research topic is the intersection of education and health. The two topics are evoking intensive discussions around not only myself but also all over the world. The news about college students committing suicide or dropping out of school because of mental illness is bring the attention from the society. It is extremely mournful to see highly educated young people being ruined or interfered by illness that we cannot see. As a result, I choose to research about the effects of mental illness upon college students. The research can, at least in some degree, sweep out the stigma.
I am going to write about the issue of mental health in US universities. Actually, I have observed a lot of cases related to mental health in US universities both directly and indirectly. For example, a Chinese student in our university and my major, Physics, locked himself in his apartment for four months because of depression. As I took abnormal psychology last semester, I can say that I have some academical background in this topic. However, based on what I have read and what I have experienced, I think I might have already chosen a point of view as someone who wanted to evoke the empathy from normal students and faculties to the population having mental disorder. As a result, my information gathering of my research might be a process of trying to find evidences to support the preexisted thesis. In order to enjoy the pleasure of finding out something brand new as Gerard did, I should forget what I have planned to write about and try to let the information I am going to access tell me what should I write about. Although my topic is not on the list, I do believe it closely touches what are listed. In order to avoid being ordinary and cliche, I think I will incorporate more academic resources instead of merely using social materials.
I hope this letter reach you well. How is your semester going so far?
I am enjoying my second semester of the freshman year. My RHET course requires
me to write a research paper. I am, really, excited about writing it.
Before I begin writing the paper, I should select a topic by myself. Although I haven’t decided which to choose yet, I want to write about education and violence. As a college student, I have plenty of accesses to information and experiences related to education. Moreover, the current condition in the states is unstable, and violence is happening all over the country; thus, I do believe it’s important to discuss the relationship between education and violence that might contribute a solution to this issue.
In addition, I have finished several critical responses since the beginning of RHET 105, and I also have received comments from Prof Marry. I did well in my style of writing, but the several elements from my writing were cliches which should be avoided in further writing. I would like to explore a new structure of my essay to improve my writing. I began reading writings from accomplished authors, and I hope this action can make me improve. Next time, I am going to use technology to correct my grammar and spelling errors before uploading my assignment to get a better grade.
I am looking forward to seeing you as a college student!
The structure of my essay is good, and I like my in-depth analyzation.
My stye of formatting is really rigid and full of cliche.
I should prove read my essay to avoid grammar errors.The sentences should also be more concise through deleting unnecessary words.
I read and appreciated essays from more accomplished writers to improve my style of writing. The writer’s center can also be used.
I should keep revising my essays until it satisfies me.
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