After getting my grade back for this paper, I was very surprised. I thought that I had written a great analysis of the freshmen caps. However, I did not follow the assignment requirements. The assignment was to write a Toulmin analysis and use Toulmin’s vocabulary. I did not do this. I looked at all the aspects of a Toulmin analysis, I just never clearly outlined each one. After revising, my essay clearly identified the main parts of a Toulmin analysis and now fits the prompt.

From this I have learned to always read the assignment closely. I only had to add a few lines in order to identify the parts of a Toulmin analysis. Had I read the prompt carefully, I would have not made this mistake the first time. Additionally, the original essay did not cite any paraphrases. This was easily fixed by adding in a few citations. I was not aware that you had to cite information that you do not directly quote from sources when I wrote the original essay.

Other than these high order concerns, I fixed spelling errors and made many of my sentences more concise. The essay reads much smoother, identifies the parts of a Toulmin analysis, and has clear boundaries between the sources’ work and mine.