Believe it or not, this essay needed more revising than the first one. Most of my writing in this essay was not concise and to the point. If this class has taught me anything, it has taught me how to make shorter sentences with more meaning.
For example, the phrases “there is” and “there are” was used too much in this essay when I could of just reworded the sentence. Not only is the removal of “there are” and “there is” a space saver, but it also makes the sentence more active and straight to the point.
Like the first essay, this essay lacked in ethos. I was not lying when I said that this concept was embedded into my brain now. At first, my readers did not know who Adler was. He could have been a serial killer for all they knew. Now, they know he’s a philosopher and his words hold more value.
Lastly, I saw a new point to add to my thesis. I even changed the title. This class has taught me that writing takes time, even new ideas can pop up 3 weeks later. After reading the essay over a gazillion times, I finally realized the idea that molds Adler, Lamott, and Bradbury closer — perfection takes time.